03/30/2008: "Leaving The Nest"

Many times in our life we are going to lose something, or we're going to have our kids move away, or perhaps we have to say goodbye to friends that we lived near for many years. It's interesting that I actually don't have a bible verse to reference this subject or topic. But it seems that many people hold on to not only memories of the past, but they have a very hard time of letting go of the people they love or loved.

I won't dispute that marital or love affairs that end are very tragic, and even if both parties wanted it done and over with I think aside from extreme cases involving abuse there is still a bit of missing the other person in all of us. Aside from that I think it's very hard on parents that have to let go of there children finally. Whether they finally move out of the house, across the country, or are leaving for college. I think parents have to go through a deep sense of absence and loss because of this. It's just hard to imagine that they loved and cared for someone so long and now what once was a baby is an adult of there own and needs to go out into the real world and live there own life. It's almost like a dangerous excitement. A part of them is happy for them, and is excited for their future; while another part of them is going to miss them extremely and be deeply saddened by not having them around like they usually were.

I don't know if it makes having kids harder on parents, and I imagine not. As it's just part of the process of being a parent. I read something earlier today that said in parenting a really good thing for the child is to take special time out of each day to acknowledge there existence of course, and let them know you really care for them. Even if it's just a small conversation daily, it reinforces the fact that you love them and they are an important part of your life. Sure sometimes you'll argue in life, there will be times when the kids don't do there chores and it will frustrate you, but at the end of the day both child and parent really need to be grateful for the time they have together. It's hard to be grateful while you have something, but it's so painful to let go without having taken the time to spend with each other.

I'm not telling anyone out here how to parent there children, and I'm not saying that we don't love our children or our parents. All I wanted to say was that it's worth that five minutes or ten minutes a day spending with our child/parent to let them know we care about them, and in the end it will lessen the pain hopefully of finally having to let go.